GENTLEMEN, IT'S TIME FOR YOUR ANNUAL "AM I GAY?" SELF-EXAMINATION (brought about by Broke Back (or Butt) Mountain....):
1. If you are over thirty and you have a washboard stomach, you are gay. It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the boys and have spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups, aerobics, and doing the Oprah diet.
2. If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaaming homo. A cat is like a dog, but gay. It grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed. And just think about how you call a dog ... "Killer, come here! I said get your arse over here, Killer!" Now think about how you call a cat .."Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!" Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so gay.
3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, baby pacifiers, or any such nonsense, rest assured, you are a Gaylord. A straight man only sucks on bar-b-que ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, crawfish guts, pickled pigs feet,or tits. Anything else and you are in training to suck El Dicko and undeniably a fag.
4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or piss in a parking lot, you crave a deep homosexual relationship ... A man's world is his bathroom; he defecates and urinates where he pleases.
5. If you drink decaf coffee with skim milk, you like a high hard one in the poop chute. Coffee is to be hard strong, black, and full aroma. A straight man will never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim," and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener tastes like. If you've had NutraSweet in your mouth, you've had a man there, too.
6. If you know more than six names of colours or four different types of dessert, you might as well be handing out free passes to your arse. A real man doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap as well as all the names of all the players in the Premier divison. If you can pick out "chartreuse" or you know what a "fressier" is you're gay. And if you can name ANY type of textile other than denim, you are faggadocious.
7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it, you're dying to tune a meat whistle. A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-arse driver or to cut the mofo off. The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat a beef burger, hold his beer, or play with his honey in the passenger seat (or okay, maybe sometimes his own "honey" when absolutely necessary).
8. If you enjoy romantic comedies or French films, mon-frere, vous le Gay, oui? The only time it is acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above films by yourself or with another man is likely to result in SHC (Spontaneous Homosexual Combustion) - which is what happens to Homos when they Flame out too.

lol.

I dunno though, I'm betting gay people might find that quite amusing.

lmao thats brilliant

Funny, but full of crap imo

maybe we should have a jokes section

Maz you need to sup some more beers LOL. Jammin has a good point in that a joke section might be fun.

lol good stuff

lol

rofl very funny.