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Saints Row: The Third Review

Saint's Row: The Third pack shot
Developer:Volition Inc.
Publisher:THQ
Genre:Sandbox Action
Platform:Playstation 3
Official Site:http://www.saintsrow.com/
Release Date:November 18th, 2011 (UK)
Reviewer:Andy Hemphill (Bandit)
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Within the first 30 minutes of Saints Row 3, I'd skydived through an exploding jet airliner, thrown an old woman off a skyscraper, punched 15 or so pedestrians in the crotch, clothes-lined a hooker and beaten off a crowd of sword-armed gang members... with a giant dildo. Yeah, if you were looking for realism, forget it.

If, on the other hand, you were looking for a truly fun sandbox game - a game with no limits to the stupidity or fun you can have - then look no further.

As the game begins, the Third Street Saints are riding high. Having gone from petty street gang to international media empire, the gang have got it all - money, girls, fame, their own clothes brand - everything. Hell, even the cops you fight shout "Please place your guns on the floor - after you've signed them!"

So, naturally, others have their eyes set on the Saints' crown - and form a syndicate of powerful gangs to kick them off their perch.

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In one fell swoop, the Saints are kicked out of Stillwater and dumped unceremoniously in the urban industrial world of Steelport - and you have to help the gang fight their way back to the top. Of course, whether you do that as a man, a woman - or a horrible cross-gender mess dressed in a gimp mask with the voice of a chipmunk - is up to you.

Having presented the gamer with the challenge of restoring the Saints, the game takes off the training wheels and lets you loose - and I mean that in every sense of the word.

While the singleplayer campaign is an enthralling, often ridiculous thrill ride, filled with clever nods to pop culture, films and other games, the true meat of Saints Row is found in the myriad side missions, incredibly weird activities, diversions and challenges that litter the city.

There's far too many to list here, but rest assured that Saints Row staples Insurance Fraud - hurling yourself at cars for cash, and Mayhem - blow up as much as you can, make a triumphant return, along with car surfing and hostage taking, to name a few - but some of the new modes are even more fun.

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Take 'Professor Genki's Super Ethical Reality Climax' - a completely insane Japanese-styled gameshow where contestants have to dodge horrific traps while blowing the crap out of men dressed as drinks cans, huge bunnies and cartons of milk - without shooting the pandas, on pain of a slow, lingering death.

Yes, it's as mad as it sounds.

These are but a few of the ridiculous modes that litter Steelport's streets, but if these aren't your thing, you can always go hunt gangs, watch over drug deals, assassinate people for cash, or go on a rampage for no reason. It's amazingly cathartic.

Everything you do earns you respect which can be used to upgrade your character, allowing you to take on more homies to drive round with or just run faster. Likewise, the money you earn/steal can be used to purchase new cribs or invest in the city to earn more respect or cheaper guns, for example. Not that the guns are expensive - though they are 100% fun.

The game also takes great pains to play stirring or cool music at certain set-peice moments, like divebombing a penthouse apartment with a gritty RnB number blaring, or your character and his friend singing along to a song as they mow down pedestrians - it all just comes together.

Of course, if you prefer thrown weapons, there's upgradable grenades and EMP mines, or if you're more of a brawler you can unleash the power of the 'apocofists' and punch people into gibbets of flesh for fun.

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Thankfully, the cast of characters who inhabit this insane world are just as kooky as the guns and activities, ranging from the foul-mouthed yet hilarious Shaandi to 'Z' - a BDSM-obsessed DJ who speaks through a synthesizer.

As for the Saints themselves, the gang can be customised however you see fit. Be it in cars or cribs or clothes - or insulting taunts. (I favoured the Three Amigos...) and will come to your aid as your territory expands, or if you give them a call on your in-game mobile.

Of course, as with everything in life, everything's better with friends - and with Saints Row 3's co-op mode, you can cause twice the mayhem in half the time.

As well as giving yourself a human homie to help out, the game also offers a selection of co-op missions, which are just as crazy - and two people car surfing while racing each other are always better than one.

Sadly, the co-op mode highlights my main beef with SR3 - pretty naff graphics. While GTA 4 worked hard to produce a real, living world, SR3's comedic stylings are underpinned with a fairly drab world to explore, aside from a few colourful highlights, and are shot through with graphical bugs. The pop-in is a serious issue, and the textures are poor when you get up close.

But, of course, you'd have to be standing still to notice - and you most likely won't be.

Score and sound-wise, Saints Row is a tour-de-force of writing. The characters are believable, if nuts, and the music blaring from car radios is a pleasing selection of RnB, Trance, Rab, Rock and occasionally classical (Lord knows what insanity you can unleash while listening to Beethoven's Fifth...)

The game also takes great pains to play stirring or cool music at certain set-peice moments, like divebombing a penthouse apartment with a gritty RnB number blaring, or your character and his friend singing along to a song as they mow down pedestrians - it all just comes together.

If, by some miracle, you get bored of the main campaign, SR3 also offers a 'Whored Mode' - with a 'W'. This plays as you'd expect, with some notable differences. Giant dildo-wielding scantily-clad BDSM ninjas, for one.

Summary

Take a break and wander into the mean streets of Steelport, and you're bound to have a good time. Saints Row 3 puts the fun back in the sandbox genre, offering what GTA4 lost along the way - pure, unadulterated fun. No bones about it, this game will you make you howl with laughter - provided you can overlook its little flaws.

The bottom line
8.5 / 10

Good stuff

  • Brilliant, massively varied gameplay
  • Cutting, hilarious humour
  • Cracking soundtrack
  • Hours and hours of fun

Not so good stuff

  • Dodgy graphics at points
  • Fairly drab world between bright spots


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